Wednesday, 21 November 2007

Wednesday Humour.

I really enjoy a good joke, one of the things that I miss about not living in London any more is the humour...there was always a good story doing the rounds. I rather like these few, not the greatest out there but they are clean!

Indubitably My Good Watson

Sherlock Holmes and Matthew Watson were on a sailing trip. They had gone night sailing and were lying on the deck looking up at the sky. Holmes said, "Watson, look up. What do you see? "Well, I see thousands of stars." "And what does that mean to you?" "Well, I guess it means we will have another nice day tomorrow. What does it mean to you, Holmes?" "Well, to me, it means someone has stolen our bimini top!"

My Fellow Boaters!

A charter sailing vessel with load of politicians was half way to the Bahamas when a freak storm hit the boat. Several of the passengers were thrown overboard and drowned. After retrieval of the bodies and with the knowledge that they may not be rescued for some time, if ever, the deceased were buried at sea. Three days later, the local Coast Guard found the damaged craft. Upon boarding, the Coast Guard Captain asked, "Is everyone okay?" The Captain of the damaged vessel explained that he had a few passengers fall over board. The Coast Guard Captain asked, "Are they all dead?" The Sailing boat captain replied, "Well, some of them said they weren't, but you know how those politicians lie."

Old Beyond His Years

From the dock the woman watched as the salty old sailing captain skillfully docked his boat. She was impressed that such an old man would still be sailing at his age. She decided to wait until the sailing captain disembarked. As he did, she asked him," Captain, what is your secret to leading such a long and productive life?" "Well," he said. "I would have to say it's because I smoke three packs of cigarettes a day, drink a case of whisky every week, eat a lot of fatty foods and I never exercise." "Wow, that's amazing," the woman said. "exactly how old are you?" He answered, "Thirty-one"

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